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Thursday, December 10, 2009

Not the news we wanted...

Yesterday Ethan had his 1 year checkup and he has only gained .5 ounces in 3 months and grown .5 inches. He is not able to chew and swallow food so we are still making his baby food and the doctor is concerned that he is not getting enough calories so we will be working very hard along with his Occupational Therapist to teach him these skills.

Today he went to the hospital for his VCUG and Renal Scan to find out how is kidneys were doing since the surgery in April. Unfortunately it looks like one kidney is worse than before and the other is the same. Not good news, he is now Grade V which means that his surgery in April was not successful and that he will probably need another surgery. We meet with the Nephrologist and Urologist on Tuesday and will know more soon.

I would love to say that I handled this set back well but I would be lying. I'm mad, I'm angry, I'm sad and I'm tired. I wanted to put my hands up in the air and shout out to God and ask him why??? I wanted to pull the car over and have a really good pity party. I wanted to make it all go away but I can't. I wanted to give up. But I won't because ....


these people need me and I need them...

3 comments:

Bellismom said...

I am so sorry you got all this bad news at once. Sending prayers your way! Isabelle has never been a good eater to weight checks were always a big downer for us. Hope that sweet little boy can get some pounds on him soon!

The Neffs said...

I am sorry you didn't get better news from the doctors visit. I will be praying for you all. I love the new blog look! Cute!

Diana Bleu said...

i do this all the time, but i think.. i love so hard at times its enough, I wish i had all the answers for you.. HOPE builds your strength, your heart.. not sure if i said so either, but surgery we had in July didn't work either, but i learned this past week from our nephro, is their first job is to protect the kidney, so even if the VCUG come back with horrible results it all comes down to kidney function, the Uro can get the urine out of the body using methods we as parents may not like, but if it saves the kidney then we have to chose the lesser of the 2 evils, so to speak? My child only has one kidney and her ureter got reduced if this ureter fails on us i'm sure my world will fall.. but i let that emotion happen once, and i refuse to go backwards and have negative thoughts! IF this ureter fails.. the Doctors will do everything in their power to save the kidney. HOPE.. and FAITH! LOVE.. sometimes we need journey's like this for it all to make sense.