Not the news we wanted...

Yesterday Ethan had his 1 year checkup and he has only gained .5 ounces in 3 months and grown .5 inches. He is not able to chew and swallow food so we are still making his baby food and the doctor is concerned that he is not getting enough calories so we will be working very hard along with his Occupational Therapist to teach him these skills.

Today he went to the hospital for his VCUG and Renal Scan to find out how is kidneys were doing since the surgery in April. Unfortunately it looks like one kidney is worse than before and the other is the same. Not good news, he is now Grade V which means that his surgery in April was not successful and that he will probably need another surgery. We meet with the Nephrologist and Urologist on Tuesday and will know more soon.

I would love to say that I handled this set back well but I would be lying. I'm mad, I'm angry, I'm sad and I'm tired. I wanted to put my hands up in the air and shout out to God and ask him why??? I wanted to pull the car over and have a really good pity party. I wanted to make it all go away but I can't. I wanted to give up. But I won't because ....

these people need me and I need them...